Sexism at the workplace is a subtle and insidious thing. It is more complicated than people assume it to be, and combating it is far from easy. Even as overt sexual harassment continues to be a problem, women continue to face every day indirect discrimination in the form of sexist jokes, comments on their appearance, an uncomfortable touch here, a hug which lasts longer than necessary there. Most of the times, they end up having to bear it, otherwise they are seen as cold, humourless and rude. There are other subtler forms of sexism happening as well, such as women being told to take down notes during meetings only because it is a woman’s job, or bringing food to office parties, since women are assumed to be good cooks. Research has found that such low intensity discrimination is also detrimental towards women.
Of course, dealing with sexism can be a tricky thing. Most organizations have sexual harassment policies in place, where overt sexist behaviour can be reported, but what about the pernicious, every day kind of sexism? How do women deal with that?
Well, here’s a few ways in which you can speak against sexism at work:
Turn the tables
If a colleague makes a sexist comment at you, ask them if they would have made the same remark if you were a man, or whether you only deserved it because you are a woman. You can say it in a humorous, non-threatening way, if you prefer, but your point will be made – that you are being treated differently just because of your gender. The message should make it through to them.
Have a talk with the person in private
People have a tendency to get angry and defensive if they are called out in front of a group or their colleagues. So, if you think someone is being sexist, try and have a talk with them in private in the office. Private means where you won’t be overheard, you don’t need to enclose yourself in a cabin with them, especially not if they make you uncomfortable. Stay calm and keep it simple. Ask them whether they notice they are being sexist, but in a mild way. Tell them their comments make you uncomfortable, and you would prefer it if they stopped it. Make your position clear and be firm about it. You don’t need to be aggressive or offensive, but you should stand by your point. Tell them that it isn’t okay, and perhaps that will be enough to make them see the error of their ways.
Don’t laugh
If someone makes a sexist joke in the office, don’t laugh at it. You could also ask them what was funny in that. Make eye contact with the person and be impassive. Make them uncomfortable so that they reflect upon it.
If all of this doesn’t help, and the sexism continues, you can always go to your supervisor, or to your HR. Explain it to them and be firm while you do so.
