‘Hey! Don’t you think this dress is too skimpy for this kind of gathering?’
‘Are you sure you can easily carry this skirt to college, isn’t it too short?’
‘Don’t be late from the party, it’s not safe outside’
These are some of the statements that girls get to hear day in and day out in an Indian society. Girls who wear short clothes are not looked at with respect by a fair portion of the society. If you are too blunt and straightforward, you are considered as manner less. If you generally come back home late night, then you are too outgoing and flamboyant, you are 32 and still unmarried then maybe you are too broad minded to fit in the conservative Indian society, these are some of the justification that people have for supporting their cliché viewpoints.
According to a particular section of the society which unfortunately is in majority, if girls wear revealing clothes, they are themselves responsible for molestation and rapes that happen to them as it provokes men and staying outside homes late night gives right to the public to tease or physically harass women.
The recent cases of crime against women that were reported on New Year’s Eve in Bangalore which is considered as one of the most advanced cities in India proved that if women stay out late at night, they become a vulnerable target of eve teasing and molestation and they should better stay indoors when it is dark. This was shameful act which showed that any third person has the right to molest or outrage the modesty of a woman and can escape easily after doing such brazen acts.
On one hand, as a nation, we feel proud of the rampant progress of our country in terms of technology, education and employment etc. while on the other hand, we are still trapped in a conventional, rather orthodox mindset.
We want our girls to study, choose a career for themselves, excel and make a mark in the society then why do we impose certain conformist opinions on them which eventually restricts their growth, makes them feel insecure and pulls them back whenever they wish to do something unconventional.
We want our girls to be extra cautious of their safety while they go out, be polite while they talk and that includes not using abusive language as it makes people think that she manner less while for men, it is just a bad habit which is not very harmful. We want them to dress up in an attire that leads to minimum skin show but we really admire when our favorite Bollywood divas flaunt their swanky and revealing clothes on screen, we don’t want them to choose a career that requires them to stay out late as it is not ‘safe’ or a job that demands long working hours as it hampers their family life or I should say the comfort of their family members.
While we pass multiple judgements on the way women behave, dress up and carry themselves in general, why don’t we ever form any judgements about men. As a society, why can’t we teach our men to behave like real men so that women can feel safe on the roads or anywhere while they are surrounded by the opposite gender.
If women wear short clothes, they are neither provoking men to come and molest them nor they are seducing them. What one wants to wear is his/her personal choice and a woman’s character shouldn’t be judged by her attire, while salwar kameez is considered as a decent Indian attire but a short skirt doesn’t give anyone the right to ogle or tease women.
Instead of preaching women about what to do and what not to do, if we start to teach men to be less opinionated about women no matter what they wear and what kind of lifestyle they lead then women can live in a relatively safer society.
We must understand the fact that women are also as much of a human as men are and they feel disrespect when ill-treated or judged too much. So, do not consider woman’s attire or her flamboyant lifestyle as a ground for molestation, if you consider yourself as someone with a modern outlook then do not try to control women’s conduct, just change your thinking.
