Abusive relationships can harm a person in ways more than one. They not only affect a person physically but mentally too. One can say that the physical signs of abuse are just the tip of the iceberg. Hence, in order to get over such a relationship one needs to make more effort than you can imagine. It is almost like changing your lifestyle, you will have to put in the effort and need to have strong will power and dedication.
While coming out of the relationship you will have a hundred questions which will seem really difficult to answer but as they say, time is the best medicine. And things will start seeming clearer with time.
Take your own sweet time
It will take time to recover, such things never happen instantly. So it is important for you to be patient. Let it take how much ever time it takes but come out a stronger and a more confident human being. Also, there will be times when others might add to the misery, that is when you need to draw a line and tell people to back off. Tell your friends if you want to or not want to talk about the relationship. Tell them how you’re trying to move on and save yourself the trouble of dealing with the same questions every day.
Find a confidant
At such a time, you will need somebody you can trust with your feelings. Look for a true friend, a supporter or go seek a licensed counselor. This is the time when your morale needs a boost, you need renewed confidence, and a higher self esteem and only confidants can help you get there. They will stop you from going in the wrong direction, will tell you how you are absolutely amazing on your own and how the world is waiting for your awesomeness. So let it all out in front of friends who are willing to lend you a ear.
Become expressive
This can be done in any way you wish to do it. The best way to come out of a controlling and an abusive relationship is to express whatever you have hidden inside you. Let it flow out of you, become a painter or a poet, write or sing, dance if you want to but get rid of whatever burdens your heart. Let the world know what all you had to endure and what all you still have inside of you, let everyone know how strong you are and how unabashedly creative your soul is.
Get back to normal life
You are the only one who can bring things back to normal. Getting back to the regular schedule will make you feel like you’re on the right path, it will make you feel stable, give you the time to spend time doing constructive stuff and keep you away from things that are detrimental to your personal growth. So, go back to the schedule you had before you got into the relationship, start considering yourself and things that you like to do important and start living a normal, carefree life.
An abusive relationship can destroy you beyond repair but it is only up to you how to rise from the ashes and become a phoenix that is not only strong but also encouraging to the people who might be sailing in the same boat as you. Work on yourself, invest time in yourself and come out a much better and a stronger person. Also, investing in yourself will always give you results and your efforts will never go waste.
If your relationship forces you to cry and weep and whine about it the entire day, it is the time you need to say a goodbye to the person and move out of the same. Take your whole time to decide on it, talk to your partner if there is any hope of staying together. If you two come to a point worth keeping, great else get back to normal life! Go for a vacation and enjoy the most to get over it.