This is the time of year when otherwise outgoing parents Resort to almost Anti Social behaviour - cancelling invitations, taking the phone of the hook rationing television viewing. At night they make sure their children are hard at work. They are the parents of children who are sitting exams, and their homes have been transformed into establishments of calm to ensure stress free atmosphere. Is your child overloaded? All the parents, teachers and educational psychologists outline three important areas where parents can help : ensuring that the work ( including coursebook) has been covered; developing studies skills; and building confidence. A child psychologist advices parents to regard exams 'as a family project'. It is like saying, "If you are really going to work hard and commit your time and attention, I will give you the backup and support you deserve. " Parents can also help children to pace their work, and take action if they are over-burdened. In such cases, they can practically help the child notes-making. Parents should also become familiar with the syllabus, so they can understand they are children's mood swings. Both parents need to realise that preparing for an exam is like training for a marathon. They can help by listing and discussing key issues with their children. Try a little nurturing, too. Provide a quite time for revision, and make sure children eat well and have sufficient sleep - and do pin the exam time table up. ' one of the most stressful experiences for young people standing for an exam late, on the wrong day, ' says a teacher. Everyone knows how important it is to make sure they have all the necessary pens, stationary and so on, but it is just as important to build up children's confidence. Nobody ever does better for being put down. There is no point in negging, or comparing one child with another- it just doesn't work. Opting Out What if your child seems to want to opt out, slouching in front of the TV and avoiding homework? Parents should not withdraw their affection, even if their children don't seem to be working. Most of the parents tend to think the longer a child spends in his study, the better - it is the quality of the work or study that is important. Brakes are essential: short, intensive periods of work/ study are best. Few teenagers can work productively for longer than 45 minutes. The right to fail Sometimes, overwork Masks a deeper emotional upset caused by problems at home - a badly time mishap can prove disastrous for exam results. There is often little that can counter such domestic upheaval. Even hardwork won't always guarantee good results. It is possible to work obsessively but still lack the discrimination necessary for exam success. It is vital that children know they have the right to fail. Teenagers taking exams are in a rebellious phase. What ever you do, you can't actually make them study. If you pressurize them they may use exams to get back at you. Try to let your child know that passing an exam is for them. 'It isn't usually a once-in-a-lifetime event; If they fail they can often resit the next year'. Is your child under stress? Some stress is inevitable, but take action if: Your child's personality changes- a quiet child having tantrums, for example. Your child shows physical signs of stress, such as lethargy, stomach upsets or headaches. If you think your child is under pressure: Make time to talk- don't be intrusive; just say that you are concerned. Lower your expectations - you maybe adding to the stress. Avoid badly timed holidays or house moves. Limit study to short periods and encourage physical exercise. Give plenty of treats. Explain that failing an exam does not mean your child has failed as a person.
