Feminism: Is it exaggerated?

“Are we not raising our boys right?”

“Real men don’t rape”

“Put an end to molestation; teach your boys how to behave”

We come across such statements in newspapers and social media, as soon as there is an occurrence of crime against women. Indeed, the crime against women is increasing, despite the fact that there are severe punishments for the same. Unfortunately, many such crimes go unreported due to victim’s fear of getting outcasted from the society and social pressure that a girl’s family faces which eventually makes her more vulnerable.

However, in an endeavor to create a safer environment for women, unintentionally we are slandering the men of our society. Yes, I am talking those wise men who sacrifice their own wishes to fulfill the demands of their women, who take the responsibility of her happiness and security and who give in to her tantrums just to see her happy.

When men take the responsibility of themselves and their family, it is considered as their duty and if they are unable to do so, they are considered as laid back, careless and incompetent, it is the duty of a man to respect woman but if such men do not get equal respect from the society in return, it is surely unjust.

I am not saying that feminism is bad, in fact it is indispensable especially for the socially and economically backward section of the society where women are deprived of their basic human rights, more prone to face domestic violence, social outcasting and do not have financial freedom.

But, here the question is, while encouraging woman rights and her freedom of expression are we belittling the men of our society who are good enough to not deserve disrespect and abhorrence?

Instead of creating an environment where women have equal rights, are we condescending the opposite sex in the name of feminism? Unfortunately, if we continue with such mentality then we are actually digressing from our true purpose.

I being a girl who belongs to Delhi, which is the national capital , have had personal experiences where men have been kind enough to offer help, then be it offering a seat in a public transport or making way for me at a crowded place so that I can feel at ease and here I am talking about men who were complete strangers to me.

We all must have heard about instances where men protected a woman from a group of miscreants or an autowala giving priority to a woman passenger when it is late at night, just to ensure her safety. Unfortunately, such acts go unnoticed as there is nothing debatable or controversial in them, they are simply the acts of kindness.

On one hand, we are preaching the society to respect woman, which is appreciable and quite a progressive thought, but on the other hand, in the name of feminism, we are accusing and stereotyping all men, forgetting the fact that feminism is not about victimizing women and admonishing men. Through feminism, we should strive to propagate a culture in which women can feel equal and as much human as men are, not something which instills hatred for the opposite gender.

Women are very much capable of taking the responsibility of themselves and their family, so be it emotionally or financially. They really don’t need to prove it to anyone and therefore they shouldn’t strive to be at par with men, in fact that shouldn’t be even a criterion for comparison. Females have their own abilities and they can create wonders in any area they set their foot in, so why to make the achievements of your male counterparts as a benchmark for comparison, compare yourself with someone who has quintessentially proven himself/herself as a master in a particular field, so be it a man or a woman, it doesn’t really matter.

As said by an American musician, Ani DiFranco –

“My idea of feminism is self determination and it is very open ended: Every woman has the right to become herself, and do whatever she needs to do“

Well, I would say that indeed, every woman has the right do whatever she needs to do and the day we are successful as a society in achieving that freedom for women, the ultimate goal of feminism will be accomplished.