The endless adjectives; marvelous, rewarding, adventurous, overwhelming, challenging come along with parenting. It is a bit of everything. For parents it is a tough task to know what to expect and not to expect from their children. Parents make sure that children are aware of their expectations, but sadly they are unaware of their children(s) expectation from them.
Our children lie, they are arrogant, get on our nerves, drive us mad. The point is, parenting is not a very happy experience always. My little one often question, ‘Why must I listen to you always?’
Well, she is correct. We, as parents do have unrealistic expectations. Our idea of raising better children without letting them cross the line, can cause a rift. Some important points to keep in mind
- Nobody is perfect.
Children are not up to mark when it comes to finishing a job. They have a lot going in their mind, and they may mess up. At times, it is out of nervousness and/or diffidence. It is important to accept that we all are imperfect, and it is okay to go wrong.
- Generation gap.
With changes happening around us with respect to communication, social networking, gadgets, the current generation is advanced and well aware ‘theoretically’ at a younger age. At times, they disapprove of stuff and think they are old fashioned. They might be knowledgeable, but lack maturity to handle that knowledge. So it is important to accept that generation gap exists.
- We all have bad days.
It is rather disappointing to come home after a hard day at work, and find your children in a bad mood. It is not only us, but children too have bad days. One must relate how vulnerable it felt being young on certain moments. Parents expect their children to be mature and understanding after a day of hard work, but children too expect being understood at the end of the day.
- ‘Time’ is the most precious gift.
Parents do mistake that materialistic things, as extravagant gifts, and excess pocket money, defines parenting. But it is the opposite. Time is the most important gift. Neither physical presence nor materialism, but being mentally involved is what will be always remembered by them.
- Setting right behavioral standards.
We often forget that children observe their parents meticulously. Treating them with dignity, contributes in shaping them as dignified individuals. We can only preach when we practice. Avoid losing temper, getting into heated discussions, in front of them. They will pick up wrong traits from such incidences.
- Let them learn from their mistakes.
How much ever they are told about jumping in a muddy puddle, they would still jump, and learn the after effects. It is the same about some real life experiences. Let them earn their mistakes, and learn life lesson(s). It is more effective. Appreciate the process.
- Be Forgiving.
As Parents, giving children a secure and normal life is the most significant responsibility. Some rough situations arise, misunderstandings happen, but being balanced and not bitter in front of them, matters the most.
- Practice before you preach.
Actions speak louder than words. Finally, children learn from what parents do, and not what they say. In the current world, where every behavior so mechanized, every emotion is so calculative, we must always remember that we are raising ‘human(s)’. So leading by example, is the only right way to do it.
Children are the best teachers. They teach us patience, the best of all human virtues. Parents have this challenging task of shaping their children, in their vital years.
