6 types of guys you will meet in school (and How to deal with them )

Your school is another world altogether. It is the most unique space where you will encounter all kinds of people, and hope to gain enough experience on how to tackle them. No matter which school you are in, you are bound to meet the most colourful personalities that add to your daily dose of work OR fun.

Here’s a brief of the six most prominent and permanent types of guys you will definitely meet, and how you can deal with them-

PERSONALITY #1 : THE PSEUDO- INTELLECTUAL

Accept it. We all have that one guy in our class who knows everyone and everything (at times, even those things that don’t exist). He has a perpetual cynical expression on his face, as if he believes that he is beyond the trivial things that we (as other inferior mortal beings) might be bothered with. He will recount the most outrageous anecdotes about his extravagant adventures; he may have saved lives in Syria, let someone else win a race, or be part of organizations with top secret agendas of national importance. This boy, sorry “man”, will be the one who calls your father ‘Sir’ (NOT ‘Uncle’), and will thus remain for eternity in the list of guys who annoy your parents.

Deal tip: Avoid their presence. Be on a lookout. In case you can’t escape, just smile and nod along as they entertain you with their hyperbole. When you have had enough, use the orange your mom packed in the tiffin as a weapon of choice and run.

PERSONALITY #2: THE BESTIE WHO HAS A CRUSH ON YOU

Well, well, well. This guy is your go- to person- he listens to your sob stories, makes you laugh, supports your decisions, and maintains that physical gap of decency that every girl desires. He is your best pal and you count on him for all the missed notes and the fun ‘hanging out’. Just one tiny problem; he is crushing on you all this while. No matter how clear your hints are to him that the two of you are not Adam and Eve, his heart refuses to accept it. This implies you end up feeling guilty most of the times for having unintentionally led him on, and also makes you wonder how to maintain the same camaraderie without complicated consequences.

Deal tip: Sit the sweet boy down, and talk it out with him. Let him down gently and tell him how important he is to you as a friend. You are not obliged to return anyone’s feelings if you do not feel like it. At the same time, do not lead anyone on intentionally or take advantage of him. In case things still don’t simplify, it is better to step back and let go of the friendship lest you end up hurting someone.

PERSONALITY #3: THE ANNOYING DRUGGIE

This boy is the official guide for the whole class on anything related to drugs. We aren’t talking about drugs like love; it’s the real deal here. He has a supply of all the “maal” in town, and no one knows exactly how. He can easily be identified by his puffed eyes and long, messy hair. All he can talk about is drugs, which is not always fun to hear. This one parties EVERY weekend and literally lives the ‘high’ life.

Deal tip: Check out some DIY videos on the internet on how to make creative placards that say “I don’t do drugs”. Hold this up every time he comes within 100 metres of your physical aura. Indulge in his company for no reason. Drugs never did good to anyone, not even Michael Jackson. Stay cool.

PERSONALITY #4: THE SARCASTIC ONE

This boy is too smart for his own good. He is compelled to believe that his use of (unsolicited, unwelcome) sarcasm will eradicate third- world issues. Needless to say, he lives in his own world of beautiful vanity and his many talents include getting on people’s nerves. Everyone’s life is his business and he has an opinion, usually a snarky one, on others’ matters. He doesn’t shy away from being mean or mocking you in public with his exceptional knowledge of your most embarrassing moments. He hopes to be accepted (officially) as the king of the world one day.

Deal tip: Ignorance is bliss, and bliss is what you must seek. Do NOT try to engage him in a battle of wits, unless masochism is your hobby. Accept that his existence is an irreversible mistake and wait for the sweet revenge of time. Search him on FaceBook few years down the line to see how well he is doing. Chances are he will remain single all his life, because which woman would dare?

PERSONALITY #5: THE LOVER BOY

This boy believes he is a gift to womankind. In his natural habitat, he will be found around at least one girl if not a group of them. He is a decent- looking fellow who over estimates his charm. Unfortunately, girls fall for it and end up believing his he Mr. Right- sweet, well- mannered, considerate, and loyal. He is all that; but he is this for EVERY girl he meets. This poor bloke has fallen in love so many times, that his Cupid is running out of arrows.

Deal tip: Don’t fall prey to his perseverance. Enjoy the attention when it comes your way, but don’t attach any sentiments to this personality. Most importantly, do not engage in ANY WhatsApp conversation with this dude after 12 am. Don’t go over to the dark side. Thanks.

PERSONALITY #6: THE CREEPY ONE

This boy has the strangest expressions on his face and will look at you with a stare that is impossible to comprehend. Is that desire or revenge in his eyes? Who knows? He will shock more than surprise you with his abrupt words and is quite inconsiderate of whether you wish to talk to him or not. He will appear anywhere, out of nowhere, and is quite dangerous to those who are faint of heart. Beware.

Deal tip: Avoid the creepy gaze as soon as you notice it. Do not try to stare him down, because you WILL NOT win. Nervous laughter and excuses of “I have work” may get you out of the situation. Travel in groups of three or four. Enjoy safety.