#NotAllMen and #NotAllWomen seem to be popular trends these days on social media. While it is agreed that not all men or women are the same, there are certain traits that are relatable for every person amongst their peers. In schools especially, we have certain types of personalities that stand out. In another article we talked about 6 types of boys one meets in school. It’s time now to focus on the daughters of Eve.
PERSONALITY #1: THE BARBIE DOLL
The pretty one with a squeaky voice, this girl will astound you with her Legally Blonde ways. Unfortunately though, she isn’t half as smart as Elle Woods. Pink remains the colour of her dream world, which she refuses to snap out of. Most of the boys in the class follow her floral scent, and she has zero regards for the no-make-up policy of the school. She is extremely in touch with her feminine side (may be a little too much) and you cannot help but wonder as to how she will survive the real world.
Deal tip: Do what people do with Barbie dolls- admire the girl from a distance. Do not waste your grey cells in trying to understand her way of life. Keep encyclopaedias out of her way. In case you are near her during one of her fainting spells, fan her with a notebook and hope for the best.
PERSONALITY #2: THE SOCIAL WORKER
This girl has her heart set on every social issue in the world. She wants eradication of poverty, she wants peace for the world, and she can kill you for an animal’s sake. Of course she is also a feminist and a men- basher. Extremism and hate in her blood, she will judge you at every glance. She will not even spare teachers with her lectures on international relations. She is also hoping to be the Principal of your school after the final exams.
Deal tip: Do not try to debate with her, or spark her off any issue if you care for your life. If you ever get her upset, swear to her that you are a vegan. If she starts to growl, retreat to a safe distance and throw chocolate at her.
PERSONALITY #3: THE TEACHER’S PET/ MONITOR/ SPY
You wish you were never born just so that you would not have met her. This girl is sure to be excellent at studies and knows just how to keep every teacher happy. She is the most ruthless monitor for the class; and threatens to complain to your teacher if you dare to even breathe in her presence. Ever wonder how all the inside stories and information on the secret tunnels of the school reach the disciplinary heads? Yes, it’s her. Love her (you can’t) or hate her, she is here to stay. It’s a Trumped situation.
Deal Tip: Run. Run for your life.
PERSONALITY #4: THE MELODRAMATIC PRINCESS
You don’t need to watch any daily soap on TV if you have this girl in class. She is an Ekta Kapoor serial in her own entirety. Every sentiment is felt by her ten times more intensely than any other mortal being. A poor joke will send her into a hysterical fit of laughter, and a mildly sad story will make her bawl like a baby. You don’t even know what action or word of yours will extract what emotion out of this creature. The wiring in her head is yet under analysis by renowned scientists.
Deal Tip: Carry an extra handkerchief around her. You never know when she may need it. Don’t believe her exaggerated stories; chances are that they are only stolen plots of Hindi movies. Keep a safe distance.
PERSONALITY #5: THE BOYS’ FRIEND
She is the buddy of every guy in the class, or at least, she tries to be. Proudly tomboyish, she revels in the joy of being ‘not like other girls’. This is not necessarily a good thing. This one plays all sports, back-slaps boys, does not indulge in girl talk, and probably swears a lot. She looks like one of the boy gang too, on purpose. Her fake laughter at their silly jokes is decipherable from a mile away.
Deal tip: You don’t need any. As long as you are a female, she will stay away from you herself. In case you are a boy, well then… good luck.
PERSONALITY #6: THE GOSSIP QUEEN
Filmfare is to Bollywood, as this girl is to the class. Everyone pours their stories into her loud mouth, and she caters it to the rest of the universe. She knows everyone and everything- who is dating whom, who did what (and who did not), who said what, and so on. She is unabashedly the queen of all the spice in town. She thrives on legitimate/illegitimate gossip and has a sneaky way of playing the victim.
Deal tip: Whatever you do, whatever you say, and whatever you think…do not let ANYONE in class know about it. Maintain an innocent look on your face all day long and maintain a distance of six to seven feet from her. In case she entraps you, put a small cotton ball each in both your ears and nod along as she rattles on. Peace will definitely be restored in your world.
Amazingly observed and written